Garlicky Mushrooms and Kale

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Miss M and I recently moved into a quaint (fancy word for tiny and un-exciting) apartment in downtown Lincoln, NE for a short term stay before we head off to Godknowswhere (a word a just made up for 'we oftentimes fly by the seat of our pants and don't know what the hell is coming next'.)

It is our intention to depart Lincoln within 9-12 months and see the world a bit, then settle (I use this term loosely) somewhere near the ocean, preferably with little to no winter.

It's an extremely exciting time for me, as I'm in the midst of transitioning into the career of my dreams. I don't actually like to refer to this thing as a career, because it's not really. It is indeed quickly becoming my livelihood, but that's not the reason I do it. I can feel this thing buzzing through every cell of my body. I can't NOT do it. I would do it for FREE, and in fact have for a long time. If you're curious what this thing is, go here...

But in the meantime, we are here. In this apartment. We immediately painted the dining area from fire engine red, to banana yellow. Here is Miss M exhibiting her extraordinary painting techniques.

I'll be sure to share pictures of the finished diggs... when it's completed, which might be two minutes before we leave. Just saying.

And now to the entire point of this post... the first thing we cooked in our new place. We were without gas for the first 4 days we were here. Which was super great because my oven and stove are run on gas, as is the hot water heater. So, it was cold showers and cold food for us!...
Until the fourth day, when it dawned on me that I am the owner of an electric skillet. DOH!

So, this is what we cooked in our electric skillet.

Garlicky Mushrooms and Kale with Potatoes

This is a recipe I adapted from Isa Chandra's 'Appetite for Reduction' which you can find in my little Amazon store (I think... I should really get with the program) Anyhoo... I love this book. It's what I cook from mainly these days. 

The original recipe does not call for potatoes. I added them to make for a heartier meal, as opposed to just a side dish... which I believe, is what it's intended to be.
 It's so simple and yummy and healthy. You can't really go wrong.

Here's what you'll need:
2 large russet potatoes, thinly sliced 
Fresh Garlic (about 4-6 cloves) 
8 oz mushrooms
a couple bunches of Kale
Veggie broth 

~ Heat a couple teaspoons of oil in a skillet (electric.. or NOT)
   Add sliced potatoes along with S&P to taste. Cook until softened slightly. Remove from skillet.

~ Heat a couple more teaspoons oil and add mushrooms along with a little more S&P. Saute til softened (about 7 minutes)

~Add chopped kale in batches. It will look like a buttload of kale (that's a technical cooking term, if you didn't know)  but it'll cook WAY down. Cook until wilted about 10 minutes, adding splashes of veggie broth if sticking.

~ Throw in the cooked potatoes, and saute' for another 5ish minutes.

In my world, this is served with lots o'hot sauce. Cholula, to be specific.


And know this....
There is no one on the face of this planet that can do what you can do, in precisely the way that you can do it. You are here for a reason. we need you... the world needs you to embrace your gifts and share them. YOUCANDOIT!!! 


If you're new around here, check out this post to see some of my favorite recipes. EVER.
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Check out my new 'ABOUT' page. Isn't it awesomeness?

Here's the thing I love most about life... 
It's forever changing. 
This means you can be anything at any point in time. 
Just because you were something yesterday, doesn't mean you have to be that today. 
You can choose. in this moment. to be something completely different than you've ever been before. 
The possibilities are infinite. 

This is my journey... your journey... our journey. 
Welcome to the experiment. 

A tale of learning to love myself.

The road to peace with my body and with food and with loving myself, has been a long and arduous journey. Looking back i realize that's only because I created it that way... and so it turns out is the truth with most of the going ons of our lives. 

The thing is, you see, we can only do the best with what we have, right where we're at, until we become aware of a different way. A way that is much more ease filled. 

Ease has become my modus operandi. Now, that doesn't mean that I don't ever do anything that scares the pants off of me, or something WAY outside my boundaries of comfort... it just means that I don't make a big dramatic production out of everything like I used to do in my younger years.

I have learned to lean into the unknown. I have learned to trust in the flow of life. I have learned that if I ask questions around anything that brings up funky emotions within me or scares the bajeebus out of me... 

answers, solutions, and relief will be provided. Period. That's just the way it works. 

I've learned how to actually clear out of existence entirely, the judgments and points of view I had unknowingly bought, and consequently was functioning from. This is still something I'm doing on a daily basis, but it's already changing everything. 

 It's changed my body. My self image. The direction of my life. My relationship with food. The opportunities that come to me. My interactions with loved ones. My ability to assist and inspire others. My views on finances and business. 

And, more and more changes every single day. I am constantly expanding, growing, evolving. 

What this really involves is removing everything that is not truly me. All the lies I have bought as true. All the judgments I possess that are pure limitation. 

In the midst of my self discovery journey, I vowed that when I figured this life thing out, I was going to assist as many people as possible find their way back home to themselves. This is my primary focus, the origination of my drive, and sole purpose of sharing my journey with you.  I know how scary and confusing being lost feels. 

What's so beautiful about this, is that each time I'm involved in assisting someone see the light they truly be in this world, I recognize a little more of my own light. As you begin seeing yourself clearly, the same will happen for you. 

This is how we become the change, that changes the world. 

Did you know that you already possess everything you could ever require? Did you know that you are totally unique unto yourself? No one on the face of the planet has your exact set of skills. talents, capabilities, amazing quirks, and personality traits? There is no one other than you that can do what you can do, exactly the way that you can do it. 

Would you be willing to finally see, once and for all the greatness that you truly be so that we can change the world together? 

You are here for a reason. 

Wishing you peace & love & the life of your dreams, 
Chandra Nicole 

Here's a little article I wrote on my intention for this space that is The Earthfood Experiment. 

In addition to The Earthfood Experiment you can also find me hanging out with:

I also provide Personal Transformation Coaching, which you can learn more about here

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Today I give you my all time favorite Veg-head... Isa Chandra. Not only is my name IN her name, but she has the best veggie recipes known to man. (I realize that's a little sensational... but that's the way I roll)

And what's even cooler is that she lives in Nebraska (that's my state) in my neighboring city!

I recently bought her cookbook Appetite for Reduction.... and haven't really prepared recipes from any other source since. Her foods are super simple, uncomplicated, have short ingredient lists (HUGE fan of that) and way healthy.

I also spend a significant amount of time on The Post Punk Kitchen , which is her website. Not only can you can find tons of kick ass recipes there, but Isa is a super entertaining writer as well.

I'm almost (but not quite... because I don't like lawyers and paperwork) going to guarantee that you'll find a handful (if not more) of staple recipes to work into your weekly rotations.

Now I just have to decide which of her cookbooks to buy next....

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How to make running up hills easier.

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Do our realities have to match that which we've decided to be true? Are we handicapping ourselves by believing what we see?

What if everything that's occurring in our lives is simply a residual of what we believed in the past?
What if we could change EVERYTHING the instant we decide to believe something different?

I'm going to share with you a story about exercise and running....
but really it's a story about life.

Recently I've been feeling a lot of resistance to exercise. My body was wanting to move (turns out, that's what they're made to do. Who knew?) but I just could not make it go.

Since I have declared my primary task as a Transformation Coach to be processing MYSELF out of every limitation that exists in my world, anytime resistance or judgment pops up I know there's some funky point of view that I'm operating from there. The glorious thing about recognizing a limitation is that you can then choose to clear it out of existence and no longer have to function from it. If you're curious about the specifics of this process, email me at chandra13nicole@hotmail.com

Soooooo..... when I became aware of the resistance I had towards exercise, I knew there was something there for me. I began asking a lot of questions around what this was exactly for me, and this is the awareness I received:

For many MANY years, I used exercise as a punishment. I had so many judgments about my body and was using exercise to "control" it into being what I thought it to be. Maybe you can relate?

My current reality is that I am in the midst of creating a new relationship with my body. I actually listen to it, and do what it asks of me... and guess what, it's amazing!

What if our bodies knew what it requires, more than the latest diet guru or nutrition advisor?
Oh my goodness... how much freedom would that provide in your world?

Tuns out my resistance to exercise was occurring because of the disconnect between lovingly listening to my body and using exercise to punish it. I was like, "NOOOOOO.... I will not punish you! You are amazing!" Aren't I silly?

So, I took some time to delete this point of view from which I was functioning (it took about 20 minutes) and now I feel absolutely NO resistance to exercise. In fact, I'm loving it.

Isn't this incredible news?

What if any place in your life you feel resistance, it's because you are functioning from some twisty point of view and are possibly trying to make a lie true. Look at my situation with exercise for example:  is it true that exercise is punishment for a body? No. Actually bodies love exercise. See, I was trying to make a lie true in my world.

I decided to take this experiment a little further one day on my run. It occurred to me as I was approaching a hill, I possess the point of view that hills are hard to run up. Well, that's just a fact Chandra! You might be thinking, to which I am replying, "But is it reeeaaaally?"

As I started up this hill I began struggling and my breathing became heavy. I then made the choice to pull up and clearing out of existence every point of view about hills that I have ever made true and real. About half way up that hill, my breathing evened out and I felt as if I was floating.

The next day on my run, I noticed that the same point of view had crept back in as I approached the hill. This time I did some more clearing work, and closed my eyes as I ran up the hill (I ended up running through a few bushes, but that's beside the point)... and you know what happened?

Once I couldn't perceive the hill with my eyes, I couldn't even tell that I was running up a hill.
Crazy talk. Right?

Turns out, atoms are 99.99999999% empty space.... or something like that... I'm no physicist, but you can look it up. This empty space is filled with packets of light. You and everything around you are made of atoms. So, looks like you're mostly space and light (and water)... tell me how that's not totally changeable?

It has also been scientifically proven that when an atom is observed it changes into either a particle OR a wave, variable according to the person observing it. Solid or not solid. Solid or not solid.

What if our consciousness, is interacting with all other consciousness at all times and creating our realities based on how we're looking at them. 

What if we, our bodies, and the world around us are FAR more malleable than we've ever been aware of? 

What if you could make everything in your life work to your advantage with this knowledge?
What if by believing what you see, you create more of the same?

We possess this amazing capability to imagine... you remember... that thing you used to do as a child (I assure you, even if you haven't used your imagination in years, it's still there!)... would you be willing to imagine something different for your life and your living? Would you be willing to manipulate yourself out of your current reality if it's not working for you, and create entirely different possibilities in your world?

You deserve to have everything you've ever desired... a healthy body, an amazingly loving relationship, to get paid to be you, to have the opportunity to experience everything you've ever wished to experience. There is no reason to shelve your hopes and dreams.

They are not only possible, but they are your birthright.

Check out this little article I wrote for The Empower Network called 'What if your poop doesn't have to be in a group?'... it's less about poop, and more about getting started on your incredible life :D


PS...  If you're ready to make your life actually work for you, but aren't sure how to go about it... I would LOVE to facilitate you. I am running (Haha... running!) a really great special for the month of August on my coaching services. For more information, contact me at chandra13nicole@hotmail.com
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Chocolate Mayo Cake. Say what?!

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Holy shit, I actually feel like writing about food. Can you believe it?

I really can't remember the last time I did that...

So, in celebration let's eat cake!
Lots and lots of chocolate cake.

Go make this delectable weird sounding, but definitely not weird tasting vegan cake made with mayo. Non-dairy of course.
Actually do whatever the hell you want!.. and meet me back here post haste.

I made this today for my friend (it was secretly, mostly for me)... and it is pretty darn Ah-mazing.
You can find the recipe here on the Earth Balance website.

Happy return to food blogging day for me!! 

PS What do ya say we find lots more things to celebrate in life?
What shall we celebrate next?

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Screw Everyone Else's Truth. What's yours?

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You have your way. I have my way. As for the right way, the correct way, and the only way..It does not exist.

~ Friedrich Nietzsche 

Ever since the creation of The Earthfood Experiment I've known that we're each installed with our very own truth. 

I have, since starting this blog, began living a full-fledged Earthfood Lifestyle. Vegan foods through and through. I made this choice because it's my truth. It's the desire my body has been whispering to me for a very long time.... which I was pretty successful at ignoring for a very long time.

I find foods from the earth to be nourishing to my body, and I find that a nourished and healthy body helps facilitate a healthy soul... which I believe to be the true source of a high quality life. 

 It wasn't until I listened and honored my truth, that my life REALLY began to shift.

What if all of the aspects of our lives are not independent from one another. What if they're all interconnected? What would happen to your life if you began listening to what your body was telling you, instead of all the contradicting diet and health hype that's around every corner? Is it just me, or is all that shit confusing as hell anyways?

So, what's your truth? What foods make you feel energized and nourished?
This will be different for every single person on the planet. Just because my body does not enjoy animal foods, doesn't mean it's the only way.

It is my desire to explore this idea more on The Earthfood Experiment. Let's get to the bottom of what YOUR best life is, and how YOU can be the healthiest version of you.

In the past I've done a lot of sharing of the cooking that I was doing. My life since then has shifted significantly, so there will be much less of that.

 Here are some things that I WILL be chattering about here:

~ Kick ass website recommendations and all the cool web places I like to hang out at.

 ~ Recipes that I have found and tried... or want to try (focusing on Earthfoods, because let's face it... we could probably all use a little help making lentils and brussels sprouts exciting)

~ A self love extravaganza!

~ Dreaming. Lots and lots of dreaming.

~ Whatever else YOU want to talk about. This is all about your truth anyways, right? So, please comment below (or email me at earthfoodexperiment@hotmail.com) with your ideas, desires, or things you struggle with that you'd like to work through. What if we could all be here for each other, supporting and encouraging one another, regardless of lifestyle choices, acknowledging and applauding each other for having the courage to choose our truth, despite what the world around us might be saying.

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I'm changing and shifting... wanna come along?

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Have you ever felt all stickified in life, not knowing what exactly to do or where to turn to next... trying to wrap your brain around whatever it is and "figure it all out"?

That's what I've been doing for the last 7 years of my life. Oh who am I fooling? That's what I've been doing ALL of my life.

Turns out, that wasn't working out so well for me. No matter how many 'self help' books I devoured, seminars I attended, meditations I attempted, written and verbal exercises I completed...even at my surest moments I still felt lost. Incomplete. Desiring more of... something?? There just seemed to be so many answers that I was missing. Which left me on a perpetual search.

Until the day I understood that the very answers I was seeking, were the cause of my woe.

What if every answer is a conclusion. Every conclusion a judgement. Every judgement a separation.

What if I'm not separate. From anything. From my neighbor, from the chair I sit on, from my enemy, from the breeze, from my lover, from the trees and the ocean. What if we are all made from the same stuff and are interconnected. ALWAYS. Whether we choose to recognize it or not. What if separation is the grandest illusion on this planet?

If we were all one, would it mean that each time I searched for an answer, drew a conclusion, or formed a judgment I was actually separating myself from oneness and in doing so, separating myself from... myself?? Holy moly. No wonder I've felt incomplete all this time. No wonder I was desiring more of... something. I was desiring more of me, which would allow me more of everything.

So, getting myself out of judgement and asking a WHOLE lot of questions, as opposed to searching for answers, is what I've been doing for 3 months since my last post. My life looks entirely different, and i can't wait to share it with you.

I had thought about retiring The Earthfood Experiment because my views on just about everything have shifted and changed... but I guess change is the only thing you can really be certain of in this lifetime. I wouldn't want it any other way, so I figure I'll just bring you and The Earthfood Experiment along with me on this journey, changing and shifting all the way. If that's okay with you.

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Love Lessons

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Four Thursdays after the loss of my love, I shed my last tear.

It occurred in the middle of an energy medicine class I was taking. I volunteered to come up front for work on the releasing of heavy energies. My facilitator put her hand to my forehead asking me to close my eyes and bring my heartache to the front of my mind, where I would then just BE with it.

I had my eyes closed for approximately a nano second, before the tears began rolling down my cheeks...
yes, right there in front of everyone, I cried for the very last time.

Everywhere by Bran Van 3000 on Grooveshark

This is the night I learned a couple of very important things about love:

I fully realized how powerful the love of a complete stranger can be.
I could FEEL the loving energy of every single person in that room washing over me, as I sat vulnerable, exposing my soul.

Upon the adjournment of class, I was gifted with a hug from a girl I had met only two hours earlier... she overflowed into me, completely filling me up.
I wanted to remain in her arms forever.

These people transmuted my pain into pure, brilliant, shiny love in a way I'm not sure would have ever been possible through my own efforts alone.

I know now, that I will never pass up an opportunity to pour forth love onto anyone who enters my world. This will be my expression of gratitude for every soul who has ever allowed me to lean on them, and my gift to humanity.

I also gained the knowledge that 
true love can never really be lost at all.

After this night, I slipped into a state of loving I've never known before. It is increasingly calm, and steady, and bright. There's absolutely no need or urgency attached to it. And within this space of timeless needlessness, it no longer matters whether the object of my affection comes or goes, because I know I will continue to love him regardless...

I also know that this is the only way I care to love, 
from this day forward.

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Time is Funny

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It occurred to me just this morning upon waking that I have long passed the 3 month completion mark for the 'Season of Vegan' experiment I committed to on January 1. I guess it has become so much a part of my life that I just forgot it was ever an experiment. Time has a funny way of doing that you know.

And if you haven't noticed, I have done absolutely zero cooking in the last month, with the exception of a batch of pancakes I whipped up yesterday for Miss M... which I made in my sweatpants and high heels. High heels make everything better. This is my new mantra, which is actually an old mantra resurrected. If you don't believe me... try it.

"Why the absence?" I'm sure you're wondering, possibly along with "What the hell have you been eating then?"

To answer the latter; protein shakes, peanuts, and a whole lot of take out veggie sushi.

The answer to the first question, a little more complicated and involving massive life changes.

Now you must understand, change is certainly nothing new in my world. If I think back over the last 12 years of my life (which begins the start of my 20's) It's a little hard to not notice that fairly consistently, my world gets turned upside down biennially, beginning with the C-section birth of the lovely Miss M when I was not quite yet 21.

At 23, I bought a house in the country on a half acre of land (this was a lovely turn of events)

When I was 25, I married a man. However, I never really considered the fact that I might have to spend the remainder of my life with him, it just seemed like the next logical thing to do after buying a house. Smart, right?

Consequently at 27, we divorced and sold the house. Back to the city for me! This is also the age I discovered what makes my heart sing, although it would take me 6 more years to know what to do with it.

When I was 29 years old I broke my femur in half and was installed with a significant amount of titanium alloy.

At age 31, I was life flighted from the Niobrara River with a broken back. And then I laid on my back... for 3 months.

In order to stay true to biennial form, mix into all of that 6 moves to new homes.

And we've landed squarely in year 33. My current age and clearly the time for another life flip.
I'm exhausted already, but here it goes...

Almost one month ago, the only man I have ever truly considered spending the remainder of my days on this planet with, told me he didn't wish to share his life with me anymore. I'm sure you noticed me speaking of him on this blog. He was my Sweets. I was heart broken. And since The Earthfood Experiment and the Season of Vegan was something I started largely with him, it has been a challenge for me to re-immerse myself in it... as of yet.

I have since made some very exciting life decisions, but still spend my days flip flopping between the glowing brilliance of my new life to come, and the heartache of my lost love. I'm sure with each sunrise and sunset, I'll spend more and more time basking, and less time hurting. Time has a funny way of doing that you know.

In the meantime, I've been spending every spare second available to me dismantling the constructs of my reality. I have realized that the things I state as fact, are merely walls resurrected and supported by my belief systems (which, funny enough, are usually based on complete and utter untruths).

These systems that I've installed run my life without me even realizing it. Truthfully, I'm tired of acting and reacting on auto pilot. I desire a fully conscious and present life. So lately, whenever I find myself drawing a conclusion about something by stating a fact, I then dig down below it, identify the system which supports it, and swiftly demolish it.

More truth... it's not always so swift. Sometimes I will find it begins rebuilding itself and i'll have to run back down and kick it over again. But the gift here is that once you know something, you can't 'un-know' it, so it's only a matter of time before it changes.

I'm sure you might love a couple examples of my deconstructed belief systems, right? No problemo.

Here's two facts I have stated as true:

#1 I can do it myself. I don't need anyone. 
#2 I don't want children. (more children, that is) 

Whooey.... I love exposing myself. Vulnerable rocks!

Numero Uno:
Turns out I have felt alone for most of my life. My father left me when I was young, and although my mother loved me dearly she was not able to be there for me in the manner which I required. So in order to protect myself from being hurt and annihilated, my default was to conclude that I did not need anyone at all... all the while being madly in love with love.

Since the love of our parents, whether we want to admit it or not, is of supreme importance to us and we wish to prove to ourselves that they truly did/do love us, we oftentimes replicate our relationships with them. Because, if the people we care for do what our parents did, they MUST love us too. Right?

So what I have done, is to push away, push away, and push away some more. Which always results in the people I love withdrawing and/or leaving... which proves to me that they love me??  I'm silly. Smashing THAT one to bits.

Numero Dos:
As I stated above I had my baby very young. I was alone (go figure) and broke. Although she is the sparkle in my everyday, it has been nothing less than a struggle the entire time. So, I created this belief system that children equals hardship and sacrificing oneself... when secretly I've always desired to be able to share the experience of co- creating a beautiful little being with a man I adore. Who's to say I would have to create it as I did before? I can create my life however I choose!  Who says it isn't possible for me to have the man of my dreams, a gorgeous and brilliant child, all of myself, AND save the world at the same time? The whole belief that I can pick only a couple items from the menu of life is just idiocracy. DESTROYED.

The reason I share these things with you is because I know from experience how powerful it is to have a beacon in the fog. And if I can be a beacon for even one of you, then this is all worth it.

I will be completely honest in stating that seeing yourself clearly for the first time is not the most comfortable of experiences, but I promise that after the hard work is done it is SO freaking liberating. And after awhile, you'll forget that you ever once operated based on those false systems. Time has a funny way of doing that you know.

I have so much more to say, but I'll save it for another day so as not to inundate you.

I realize that you're probably here because you're interested in food and healthy living and what-not, but if it's okay with you I'd like to use this space for now to talk mainly about life stuff that I hope can empower both myself and you alike. Is that cool with you?

I really am so glad you're here. I will see you again very soon.


PS Here are some additional truths that I've realized lately

~ Oftentimes when I judge someone, I hold the same belief of myself.
~ Anytime I am trying to prove anything to anyone, I secretly believe the opposite of what I'm attempting to prove is true.

Something to think about

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Walls of Conclusion

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I do my best to cozy down into a 'normal' life situation. Ya know, with love and cookies, and consistent bedtimes. Date nights and planning. Steady jobs with paychecks and insurance and stuff. Walking paths that have been well treaded. That's what we do here you know.

The walls of conclusion start small, building so slowly I hardly notice until one day I look up and I can't see over the top anymore. This freaks me out a little. But on paper it all looks so perfect, so I continue on.

Steady as she goes.

Cutting off every ounce of awareness to my internal knowing. Sinking ever further into unidentified despair until finally I forcefully shake free, forever changing the shaken. And find myself right back where I started once again. All heart achey and worn. Seriously wondering if I possess the strength to do this.  Feigning resistance to the lure provided by safety of the familiar, the payment for which is always backwards traveling.

This mission before me just won't seem to go away. Who signed me up for this evolutionary path anyways? Was it me? Why do I destroy everything in my life for the sake of it? Maybe that which I destroy is not actually real. Just appearing, oh so convincingly solid.

No matter how many times I turn it away, it returns in the night to knock on my door. I don't want to hear what it has to say but, out of the shear lateness of hour and weariness of my soul, I listen this time.

"Come with me Chandra", it says. "I know it's dark out and you're scared, but trust me. When the light of day dawns you will see clearly and understand. The sun will shine more brilliantly than you have ever known. And for your courage, you will be rewarded with great joys and treasures and loves."

The resignation to manipulate my trapezoid self into the square shape of normal is fading fast. It has been a long and exhausting road. I fall into the arms of this midnight caller and cry. Unidentifiable as either tears of sorrow or joy or relief. Makes no difference really. The gift I am given in this moment is an unequivocal understanding that this is my only option. And that everything will be different. But incredible.

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Are You Ready?

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~ What if I actually knew in every moment what was best for me?

~ What if I’ve been discrediting this quiet knowing, secretly brushing it under the rug, because sometimes it’s urging me to do things that appear uncomfortable or scary?

~ What if I just trusted this knowing, throwing all planning to the stars? Would my life unfold more magnificently than I could have ever calculated?

~ What if I leaned into discomfort and fear, instead of shying away from it? What are the possibilities?

~ What if I started today, following moment by moment my inner knowing?

~ What if every heartache and disappointment was a gift and invitation to rise up and be more of me?

~ What if it’s time for me to finally receive the life the life that I’ve always dreamed of?

~ What if right now, it’s time for me to once and for all, realize how beautiful & valuable I truly am?

~ What if by not realizing this, I would be doing a great disservice to the world?

~ What if the kingdom is my birthright?

~ What if each and every one of these questions applies to you too?

Are you tired of waiting for your life to happen? 
Join me. If you dare. 

Anything is possible. 

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The Un-Creation of Plans.

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Plan, plan, plan.... this is what we spend our lives doing. But the truth of the matter is that the only thing we can count on is the present. The world could be flip flop wonky tomorrow, and all the days, hours, minutes spent planning are precious moments wasted.

This is something we all know in theory, but never is it so glaringly obvious as when we find ourselves in the situation, yet again, of our higher selves having different plans for us than the ones we had been so painstakingly creating. Don't be too hard on yourself though. We do the best we can with our limited knowledged, earth dwelling selves.

We just have to somehow understand, that there might actually be something greater which requires tending to, than anything we could scheme up with our little hair brains.

So this is the consciously unbeknownst-to-me destination, I've recently arrived at.
A great majority of what I had spent the last year of my life planning, suddenly ceased to exist a little over 24 hours ago.

I now sit here finding myself romantic relationship-less. Not a new scenario in the least, but unsettling none-the-less, as I am and always have been, someone who pours themselves completely into their love life. In the past I have found the loss of this outlet for my love, to be excruciatingly painful. A pain that I would have previously eased with food, booze, or more men.

But this time is different.
I've come so far. I've grown incredibly. Much too much progress has been made to go backwards now.

Once you've had a glimpse of your purpose on this planet, and have experienced the utterly indescribable sense of knowing and bliss that accompanies it... there's no way you can make yourself forget for too long.

So this time, instead of the bedfellows I've historically turned to in times of pain.... I'm going to sit on this couch and feel every last feeling that surfaces.

No matter how ugly they may be or how much they may hurt, I will wait for them to arrive. I will accept them and give them the attention they've been crying out for. I will then shine the light of my soul onto every ounce of pain, anger, fear, or judgement I've ever harbored, transmuting each and every one of them into love.

I will do this until the day comes that I, myself, am pure love and light. Only then will I be equipped for my life's work. Only then, dare I be bold enough to attempt to change the world.

What is that going to look like exactly? Good fucking question.

Guess I'll just trust that once the inner work is done, the answer will be presented to me. One thing I know for sure, is that I refuse to spend even one precious moment worrying about it.

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A Ray of Sunshine for my Heart and Yours

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I ran across a story today here on Gratitude log, and couldn't help but share.

It comes to me on a day in my life when I'm feeling discouraged. Feeling as if my dream is impossible. A day when I'm wondering how I'm ever going to be able to help the world around me, or have the life that I so desperately desire.

Reading this story blasted a ray of sunshine into my shadowy heart, illuminating clarity and perspective. How is it that we can know so well of something, but let it slip away in an instant. Remember, forget. Remember, forget. 

 Luckily all it oftentimes takes to remember, are a band of wise words to wrap themselves around me. Like a hug from a dear friend... 

"The awesome wife and I like to walk. One day we came across a section of the sidewalk that was broken. What broke the cement you ask? Grass! Growing right out of center of the sidewalk! How does a skinny little blade of grass break through the physics of solid cement? I think we learned this in the 10th grade but I must have ditched school that day. Awesome wife, being the awesome nurse that she is, confidently proclaimed that grass must have sunlight to survive. 

Therefore, somewhere hidden deep in the quantum cellular DNA of grass, there are a billion little grass cells that don’t know they can’t break through cement. All they know is they must have sunlight or die. In fact, if you ask the grass it would say, “what cement?” 

With great commitment, intention, determination, passion and bust-ass work, a little puny blade of grass develops a samurai attitude and breaks through all the rules, realities and proven scientific physics of cement, and ultimately reaches its impossible dream, the Golden Sun! So if a puny little blade of grass can break through impossible barriers, what big cement barrier is in the way of your impossible dream—that your commitment, intention, passion and bust-ass work, can’t possibly break through?"

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Oatmeal Apricot Pancakes

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Before I started this Earthfood Experiment, pancakes were a lovely treat that I made for Miss M and Sweets on the weekend, in which I never partook. These cakes o'the pan were just never my favorite made the traditional way with white flour and eggs and all reminiscent of fluffy white bread. 

Call me a weirdo, but I prefer my breads to be of the whole grain persuasion. I've been a loyal fan for years now. To me, they have so much more flavor than the white stuff... all nutty and chewy and delicious. Yum.

So, for the last couple months I've been experimenting with making pancakes from whole grains and fruits on the weekends... which I actually eat! 

These Oatmeal Apricot Pancakes are, hands down, my favorite so far.

 I bought a new cookbook last week called Vegan Planet, in which found a recipe for flax-berry pancakes. I switched out the white flour for whole wheat and oats, reduced the milk, switched the berries to dried apricots, and added in some ginger and a little maple syrup to sweeten.

 Beware, you may possibly become addicted to these. But it's okay... they're good for you!!

10 dried apricots 
2 T ground flax seed 
3/4 C. whole wheat flour 
3/4 C coarsely ground oats 
2 tsp baking powder 
1/2 tsp. salt 
1 tsp. ginger 
2 T. maple syrup 
1 1/4 C soy milk 

~ Chop dried apricots and put into microwavable bowl with 1/2 Cup water. Microwave for 3 minutes. 

~ Drain off apricot water into a small bowl (should be about 1/4 C) and stir flax. Set aside. 

~ In medium bowl, stir together all of the dry ingredients. 

~ Mix into the dry ingredients the soy milk, maple, & gelled flax mixture. 

~ Stir in chopped apricots. 

~ ladle 1/4 C portions onto a hot buttered skillet and cook on both sides until browned. 

~ serve with Earth Balance Coconut Spread and a splash of maple syrup. 

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It Starts with Me.

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Some words that I'm thinking about today....

“To put the world in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must cultivate our personal life; and to cultivate our personal life, we must first set our hearts right.”


Oftentimes I feel torn as to where to put my attention when it comes to the injustices of the world. At any given moment in time, there is a multitude to pick from. Take for example the Kony 2012 campaign that has gone viral over the last day or so.. If you haven't yet caught wind of this, I have embedded the video below. After I watched, I felt overwhelming compassion and an intense longing to help the victims of this tragedy. That being said, there is some injustice that occurs everyday which begs for my attention. How do I choose where to look? How do I decide in which direction to project my attention and efforts? There is so much work to do, it is overwhelming to look at the big picture and try to figure out where to start. 

But, the truth of the matter is that I know where to start. I can feel it in the depths of my soul. And at first glance, it appears selfish.... It begins within me. I can donate money, or hang signs, or rally, or protest, or write letters to senators, or whatever. This may help to clear up one situation or one misdeed or injustice... which will be promptly replaced with another of similar magnitude. Or worse. This leaves us in a state of perpetual protesting or fighting what is. 

The only way to make lasting change is to change the state of the human condition. To raise the level of consciousness on this planet. To wake up, stay awake, and help nudge our neighbors into alertness. This starts with me. It starts with you. 

We must pay attention to our modus operandi, our perpetual states of being. 

Are we consistently thinking, acting, being from a place of understanding and conditional love for ourselves and those around us? Or do we move through our day judging those we come into contact with?

 Are we carefully choosing the thoughts we allow into our heads, letting only those of kindness and peace enter? Or are we letting our thoughts control us? 

Are we interacting with people as if they are extensions of ourselves (they are)? Or are we maintaining an illusion of separateness? 

These are the questions we must be asking ourselves everyday. This is the work we must do to create lasting change. It's not always easy.  It takes consistent effort. Sometimes we will forget, and remember. Forget and remember. But don't be discouraged by this, because each time we remember, we remember for just a little bit longer.

And when finally, remembering becomes our constant state of being. When our hearts are finally set right... this is when our personal lives are cultivated, our families are put in order, followed by the nation, and then the world. 


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